Managing Conflict in Marriage, Part 3 of 3
By: admin
Managing conflict in marriage is primarily an outgrowth of each partner demonstrating the ability to manage his or her own mental and emotional state. We have discussed in earlier articles the value of one’s sense of internal well-being in growing a healthy intimate relationship with your spouse.
Let’s discuss a specific application to something married couples face on a regular basis: conflicting agendas. I am hungry and want to leave the house to get some dinner while my wife’s agenda is to tidy up the house before we go so that when we have the open house tomorrow everything will look just right. I want to leave the house right now and she wants to spend an extra 20 minutes before we go. Does this dynamic sound familiar? Read More…
Resolving Conflict in Marriage, Part 2 of 3
By: admin
In Part One, we learned that conflict in marriage often occurs when both partners are in a triggered state, each of us reminded of some pain from our past that has never been resolved and each of us secretly wishing that the other would have the capacity to witness our pain without judgment. All we want is to be understood. Read More…
Resolving Conflict in Marriage, Part 1 of 3
By: admin
Resolving conflict in marriage would have been a great class to take in college. In fact, based upon having over 30 years of practice being conflicted in my own marriage, I think I could have benefited from several semesters on the subject.
The divorce rate in this country is around 50%, which suggests that most of us have never learned how to effectively deal with marital conflict.
So where do people go to learn about how to resolve conflict? Read More…
Reducing Stress
By: admin
Since stress is a function of two forces in opposition, we can reduce stress by changing the oppositional forces, or by changing our perspective on them. If I am in rush hour traffic and traveling less than one mile per hour and worried about being home on time for dinner, I am likely to be stressed out. If my younger son is habitually late to family functions and I expect him to be on time, this will likely cause a stressful reaction.
Unpredictable weather conditions such as those that occurred over the holidays in Europe, causing airports to shut down and strand travelers at airports cause stress for thousands of people. Does this sound stressful? You bet it does. How is it possible to reduce our stress under such dreadful circumstances? Read More…
